The Peculiar Problem of Private School Parents
What a week. If you missed it, there was a divisive contest this week that many think will have a huge bearing on our future. Zealous morons huddled in tight groups, confident beyond their own comprehension (as is the custom of zealous morons), viciously criticizing opponents and excluding dissenters. The contest I refer to was Saturday’s 6-year-old rec league soccer game.
On one side were a dozen six-year-old girls in powder blue jerseys and black shorts. Their parents were rigged out in all the right designer leggings and quarter zip sweaters and golf course chic accessories. They spoke about their jobs in "real estate" and "cardio-thoracic surgery." Nauseating people. These are the private school parents. Zealous morons.
On the other side were a dozen six-year-old girls in slightly darker powder blue jerseys and black shorts. Their parents were rigged out, well, in all the right designer leggings and quarter zip sweaters and golf course chic accessories. They spoke about their jobs in "finance" and "orthopedics." Really great people. These are the public school parents. Love them.
When the powder blue team scored the first goal against the slightly darker powder blue team, the obnoxious powder blue parents erupted in cheers and high fives. What losers! You draw your self-esteem from a 1st grade soccer game, you losers? They're so into their kids that I guarantee those kids will turn into whiny, stupid adults just like them. Have fun with that.
When the slightly darker powder blue team tied the game, the slightly darker powder blue parents...well, ok, they cheered too. But their cheering was better. It was the kind of cheering where you could tell that their kids would be fine adults someday, just like they are.
The game was close. The powder blue team eventually prevailed, mostly because they cheated and the ref sucked. Or did the slightly darker powder blue team win? Ok, I really don't remember. But regardless what I learned this week is that private school parents are terrible people.
